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Geschrieben am: 21.11.2009 um 01:37 Uhr
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There´s nothing. I neither see nor feel anything in that black world of my inner soul. There isn´t even the wish to sense anything. I´m bereft of having only one thought.
I permit you to think.
Wishes and desires are crushing upon me. The whole world of those foggy pictures and illusionary words who normally meant to be not enough now are enough. No, it even seems beautiful. I am content to only be.
I permit you to feel.
Life as an paradise of glory and contence disappears and is replaced by fear, by ache, by injuries. The entire embodiment of my lungs are so deeply hurting that I don´t know if there is anything other. Only one moment later my mind is up to recognize that my throat is struck into punishment. It is like little chains pulled around my pipe of aspiration and tears out the last glimpse of life essencial air, and the only wish that I´m able to have is breathe.
I permit you tu aspire.
The first sequences of regaining consciousness are seemingly ending, because my body actually wants to lose consciousness. My will uses the impossible speed of my raging mind to keep the struggle for life.
I permit you to open your eyes.
There are coulours I´ve never seen.
(Nach einem englischen Film geschrieben, deswegen die Sprache)
Ich habe Angst vor dem Tod, doch wenn ich sterbe, dann freue ich mich darauf
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